Life’s Unanswered Questions

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Life's Unanswered Questions

I am 51 years old and I have so many unanswered questions in life!!!

Like:

  • I still haven’t found out who let the dogs out or where’s the beef…I still don’t know how to get to Sesame Street, and in this age of technology, why doesn’t Dora just use Google Maps or Waze?
  • Why do all flavors of fruit loops taste exactly the same, or just how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Why are eggs and light bulbs packaged in flimsy containers, but batteries are secured in plastic that’s tough as nails? Why does the flavor in Fruit Stripe gum only last a few minutes, but the mint in Wrigley’s Spearmint can last for hours?
  • Ever buy scissors? You need scissors to cut into the packaging of scissors! I still don’t understand why there is Braille on drive-up ATMs or why “abbreviated” is such a long word. Why is there a “D” in “fridge” but not in “refrigerator”….Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor yet dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
  • If man evolved from monkeys, how come we still have monkeys? Or why doesn’t McDonald’s sell hotdogs? Have you ever been to a movie theater and wondered which armrest is yours? Then there is whatever happened to “B” sized batteries?
  • Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? And why do you have to “put your two cents in”…but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts”…where’s that extra penny going to anyway? Why does the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same tune, and why did you just try to sing those two previous songs? And just what is Victoria’s secret? I’m fairly sure that she can’t have too much left; that is a “secret”. And what would you do for a Klondike bar when you know as soon as you bite into it it’s gonna fall apart? Does she or doesn’t she what? Why do you care if I got milk?
  • What’s the difference between normal ketchup and fancy ketchup?  And why do caregivers and caretakers mean the same thing? Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don’t lay eggs. Why does grape flavor smell the way it is when actual grapes don’t taste or smell anything like it.?
  • Why do stores that are open 24 hours a day, have locks on the doors? Why do you drive on a parkway and park on a driveway? Why did the most interesting man get replaced, is he no longer that interesting? Why is it so difficult to peel the sticker off of a brand new non-stick frying pan? And why can I remember the lyrics to a song I heard some 30 years ago, but I can’t find my car keys I had 15 minutes ago?
  • Why is it that when we “skate on thin ice”, we can “get in hot water”? Is a pessimist’s blood type B-negative? How can something be “new” and “improved”? if it’s new, what was it improving on?
  • And do you really think I am this witty?!?! I actually got this from a friend, who stole it from her brother’s girlfriend’s uncle’s cousin’s baby momma’s doctor who lived next door to an old classmate’s mailman, who knows this guy with a cat.

Now it is your turn to take it from me…Peace!!

Copy and Paste, change the age, and enjoy your day!!!

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Average Joe

Welcome to the Average Joe Weekly blog. This is basically my place on the web where I can help spread some of the knowledge that I have accumulated over the years. I served 10+ years in the Marine Corps on Active Duty, but that was some 25 years ago.

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  • Average Joe

    Welcome to the Average Joe Weekly blog. This is basically my place on the web where I can help spread some of the knowledge that I have accumulated over the years. I served 10+ years in the Marine Corps on Active Duty, but that was some 25 years ago.

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By Average Joe

Welcome to the Average Joe Weekly blog. This is basically my place on the web where I can help spread some of the knowledge that I have accumulated over the years. I served 10+ years in the Marine Corps on Active Duty, but that was some 25 years ago.

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