Waiting For What Feels Like Forever

Mrs. Average is having a major medical procedure today. We drove up from Fredericksburg to Fairfax, which on paper is 45 or so miles, but it takes about 1.5 hours. We chose to stay the night at a local hotel, that is close(ish) to the hospital. Again on paper, it is 5 miles, but in reality, that drive takes more than 15 minutes.

We had to be here at 6 a.m. which is why we chose to stay local, so we didn’t have to worry about the time. I know that there are thousands that make that drive daily, but I’m not one of them and to be honest, that drive sucks.

As I’m typing this post, she is under heavy sedation and the careful scalpel of the surgeon. Something just feels off today and I honestly hope it is just me and my overactive imagination.

The waiting room sits about 30 with seven of us all waiting for our loved ones. I’m still amazed at how many people keep their cellphone volume up loud, either the ringer or the media sound. I have heard so many conversations and so many reels on Facebook, it is sad. I guess we can’t keep shit to ourselves anymore.

This one guy who speaks Spanish has had a dozen loud conversations, ugh. I get up to use the restroom and when I return, this bitch and her daughter who is best described as a foul nasty little troll of about 16 years old, took my seat. I mean, they were across the room and saw me go to the restroom (which is in the waiting room), they got up and took my seat, lol, some people. Then Mom and the hateful troll have been at the reception desk in the waiting room bitching about everything from the temperature to the lighting, yes the lighting.

This guy who is waiting for his spouse, is watching her purse. He has left it unattended three times so far as he has left the waiting room, once to use the restroom and twice to go get food. I mean, he left it for a good 20 minutes. I hope that there isn’t anything valuable. This one patient left her purse when she went back for her procedure. I told the reception lady, but she was too busy on Facebook to care.

I was expecting about a 4-hour procedure according to the doctors and it has been less than two hours. They just updated the board as “Procedure Closing”, which has thrown my anxiety into a tailspin, hoping that they got everything that they went in.

Sitting in a hospital is a very humbling experience. Not just waiting for your loved ones, but if you are near the Emergency Room, you often get to hear the announcements of arriving critical cases, such as a stroke. Hearing them announce that a stroke victim is arriving in five minutes, makes you stop and think about how everyone in the world can have a bad day and you never know what problems they are struggling with. My father-in-law passed away from a major stroke a few years ago, and Mrs Average and I took off to Ohio to see him and her family. Though we made record time, we never saw him conscious again.

Having multiple invisible illnesses, I try very hard not to judge people, because you never know what they are dealing with. I have had people tell me that I don’t look sick, thus the “invisible illness” comment.

They should come and grab me shortly to go to the consultation room, where I will find out the details of the procedure and know what is going to be next. The plan for today is likely to go back to the hotel for the day so she can sleep off the medications, before the fun drive back south to home. I would prefer if she got a day away from the house, simply because of the cats, I’d rather not have the cats climbing all over her and she is the mom in the cat kingdom, so that is a tough one.

Great, they just moved the sign back to “procedure”, from “closing”. I don’t know what in the world that means. I hope that isn’t a bad thing, but I guess I have to wait it out and see, It is going to be a long day for sure.

You can pretty much cut the tension in the waiting room as several others noticed that the board unexpectedly changed in the wrong direction. No answers, just concerns from several of us.

I so hope that I don’t get COVID or some other crap from this adventure. Everyone is coughing in this waiting room. Well hell, they just moved it back to closing after about 20 minutes of “procedure”. I don’t know what this means…..

After another 20-minute wait, they moved the board back to “procedure closing” and then shortly they moved it to recovery. That was followed by the Average daughter arriving as well as a phone call from the doctor telling me that all went well and that Mrs. Average was in recovery and doing well and to expect a call from the nurse soon. 

Sure enough, a call from the nurse followed in a short time and she gave me the details as well as telling me that prescriptions were sent to the Fredericksburg Costco. Well hell, we weren’t going back to Fredericksburg tonight, and once I explained it to her, she said she would get the doctor to change them to the hospital pharmacy. She also explained that Mrs. Average will be sent home with a catheter and will need to come into the office tomorrow morning to have it removed. 

Moving forward, we have Mrs. Average and we are back at the hotel, hopefully for the night. I run to Walmart to get supplies that we will need that I didn’t plan for. Which is so out of character for me, since I plan everything to the nth detail.  I’m off to Wallyworld, to grab supplies, and the Average daughter is ordering pizza, cause that is what they want to eat. 

All went well, so well in fact that I did the one thing that I knew I shouldn’t have, but I allowed myself to get talked into it, and that was go and do something that I wanted to do, and in this case that was I wanted to go to “Micro Center”, which is an IT nerds paradise. I pretty much just rushed through the store as I felt guilty for going and stopped at Chick-fil-A to get milkshakes which was what the girls wanted. As I pull into the hotel parking lot, I see Mrs. Average and the Average daughter, both walking toward the daughter’s car. I said, what’s up and I was told that we needed to go to the ER as the O2 level for Mrs. Average was too low.

Off to the ER and OMG, I thought the Fredericksburg ER was nuts, this place is crammed with people, but first I have to drop off the girls, and then drive to the parking lot, and walk back the 1,000 plus feet back to the ER. I walk in and I get immediately flagged for my pocket knife, which is a CJRB AR-RPM9 folding blade. I’m told that I need to take it back to the car, or they can store it there for me. Well hell, I’m not about to walk back to the car, mostly because my right knee is on fire at that point as well as it is super swollen causing my foot to swell as well. I ended up checking it in with security, thinking that I would never again see my favorite blade, but it is what it is at that point. 

This ER (Inova Fairfax) was an absolute madhouse, every single seat was taken and people were standing all over the place and here we are, with my wife who got out of surgery less than six hours prior, can’t stand up straight, and carrying a cath bag. Just as I was able to get her a seat, they called her back, which was super quick. In triage, I was able to get her a wheelchair, but it wasn’t just as easy as asking, I pretty much had to beg. I guess they are comfortable with having a patient who had abdominal surgery, standing around for hours. 

After triage, we were sent back to the main waiting room for several hours, but at least she had a wheelchair and in another 20 minutes, a whole herd of people left for some reason, mostly at the same time. 

It seems like non-English speaking people were the majority of those in the waiting room it was about an 80/20 split. For some reason, native Spanish speakers in northern Virginia seem to have to speak on their phones using the speaker phone function and talking very loudly. It seems that about 40% of those don’t have their phone, were in video chat, with others, not doctors or nurses, they were relatives or good friends. 

Mrs. Average and the Average daughter went to the back when called, and I stayed in the waiting room as they said that they could only take one person plus the patient, in fact they only wanted the patient, who again, can’t get out of a chair unaided and is not in her best mind considering she just got out of surgery not that long ago.

As I was hanging in the waiting room, I watched an altercation that required a half dozen rent-a-cops to come and escort a lady out of the hospital. I think she was like the lady next to me who appeared to be squatting there.

This other lady was trying so hard to keep her toddler calm who was not feeling well and was screaming in obvious discomfort. 

That is one thing I noticed emergency departments no longer seem to do, which is actual triage. They no longer stop the bleeding or help ease the pain, they now have you sit in the waiting room for hours on end (the family record is 25 hours in the ER waiting room) with no treatment. I was there once in a great deal of pain for 18 hours and they kept telling me that they would get me something for the pain, once I saw the doctor, but when asked when that would be they would say, 6-8 hours or more. Mrs. Average was once at the Fredericksburg ER, bleeding all over the place, on the floor and they didn’t care, they never once even looked at it to see how bad it was, they just checked her in and had her wait and wait and wait. The local ER departments pretty much suck, period.

We left the Inova Fairfax ER after midnight and returned to the hotel, with no treatment at all. In eight short hours, it would be time to go to the doctor’s office for to follow-up. BTW, I was able to retrieve my favorite pocket knife, bonus!

Sadly, that was much of a better experience. I drop my wife off and she is forced to either wait 15 minutes for me to return or she will have to make her wait up to the doctor’s office and I will meet her there. This medical campus (Inova Fair Oaks Hospital) is not laid out for patients, but instead to make things easy for the doctors. The parking garage is not very accessible for those who are not in a wheelchair but require accessibility. We don’t have a handicap sticker, which in this case would not have helped as the designated parking spots were all taken. 

I dropped her off and drop halfway across the campus, to park in the parking garage. Up to the top floor and then walk down to where I dropped my wife off at. The elevator in the parking garage is not working, so I run down the stairs and then navigate the campus to the building I left her at. The only close parking is designated for doctors and staff only. 

When we were done with the appointment, I had to do the reverse, except Mrs. Average waited outside for me, it took me close to 15 minutes to come to get her. I don’t understand why places like this don’t have patient drop-off locations or parking closer for patients.

Back to the Mrs. Average saga. As I finish this post, she is at home, and resting comfortably.